I pray I will never be the "I-blog-every-single-day-of-my-life-just-so-people-visit-my-site" kind of person. I write because I have something to say. I write because I enjoy it. I write because Jesus fills my heart and my mind with big huge dreams, big huge thoughts, big huge questions. I write because I love people.
I don't write for the numbers. I don't write in a hope to make money or gain any kind of fame. I don't write because I think my opinion is the best opinion and I don't write because I'm looking for a debate or an argument.
I just write.
I have learned to come to this space with a freedom similar to that which I carry when I come to Jesus.
I just come to Him. I just come here. That's it.
I had a friend say to me recently, "I just don't know how to approach God. It scares me."
So I started to think about what it looks like when I approach God. What it looks like when I talk to Him, when I cry out to Him, when I am upset with Him, when I listen to Him.
And I realized this: I have no special advice or words of wisdom when it comes to being with Jesus.
Just come to Him. That's it.
Come to Him like you come to your best friend, your favorite teacher, your biggest supporter.
Come straight from your comfy bed with your morning breath and your baggy sweatpants. Come with your wild hair, your unwashed face, and last night's dishes still sitting in the sink.
Come as soon as the alarm goes off, or after three or four (or ten) smacks at the snooze button.
Or you know what? Maybe mornings aren't really your thing. But somewhere along the way, someone told you that this was the best way to meet with God. That bright and early meetings with Jesus are the best time, and you need to start your day with God. So you keep trying to muster up some sort of excitement at 6 am.
*Friends, there is no best time. There is you- your individual, beautiful, particular heart- and there is God, His love a deep and wide river. And it doesn't matter when you step into the river. All that matters is that you come.
Come with your mind skittering a million different directions. Come with your impossible to-do list, and don't feel one bit guilty when your mind keeps drifting back to the day's impending demands. Just take note of it, and make your back to the quiet. It's okay. There will be many trips back and forth while you're there. From worry to listening to planning to speaking to singing to writing to hoping to wondering and then back around again. That's part of life with Jesus. and it's okay.
There have been so many moments in my little life where Jesus has reminded me of this. Me who doesn't need help, thankyouverymuch, and will do it all by myself even if it kills me. He reminds that stubborn pride in me that I need Him. I will be weak. I will be weary. and that's okay.
Maybe all this time, you've been trying to come perfect. You've been trying to come wide-awake when you're just exhausted. Maybe you've been trying to work up some kind of super faith when you're heart is sinking deep in the throes of doubt.
You don't have to hustle for approval in His presence. Come weary. Come beloved.
Come reluctantly or expectantly. Come half-asleep or half-alive or broken into a thousand pieces.
Stare blankly at your dimly lit walls in the chilly, dark morning and say nothing. Or say everything. Rant and rave and whine and cry and bare it all to Jesus- your whole fearful, thankful, jealous, hurt, angry, hopeful heart.
Just come.
Tell Him what's on your heart. Even if the words sound unholy or unacceptable in some way. I promise God can handle it. He can handle impolite. He can handle wild. He can handle your temper. He can handle tears.
Come. Just come.
Come with a stone cold heart and sitting in silence. Come bitter. Come distant.
Read in His presence. or don't. Journal in His presence. Or don't. Sing in His presence. Or don't.
Just come. Honestly. Honestly sit at the feet of Jesus, bringing the entirety of yourself with you.
Maybe you won't feel anything. Maybe you'll feel nothing but the cold seeping through the floorboards and a weary dread for the mundane tasks of another day. Another week. Another year.
Come anyway.
Come even if you're not one bit sure about Jesus in the first place. Start simple. Just come. Look for the open arms, the ones that are welcoming the weary. Start with Jesus, just sit with Him, the one who loves to invite the imperfect: the mad-at-their-kids. the burnt-outs. the sick-and-tireds. the pissed-at-their-spouses. The one who sits in traffic, feeling rage she can't understand. The one who doesn't know what to do, what direction to go. The one who can't balance home and work and family. The one who can't stop crying. The one who's full to the brim with happiness.
Just come. Start with Jesus, who welcomes the overwhelmed. The hopeful. The hopeless.
He's looking at you. You who doesn't have one scrap of their life together, and He LOVES you.
He's looking at you. You who likes to pretend like you have every scrap of your life together, and He LOVES you.
It's just Him. and it's just you.
Just come.
The first step. Really, the only step. Take it.
It's so worth it.
and it's the one you will keep taking every weary, heavy-laden, joyous, hopeful, normal, average, noisy, lovely day of your life.
Come with your mind skittering a million different directions. Come with your impossible to-do list, and don't feel one bit guilty when your mind keeps drifting back to the day's impending demands. Just take note of it, and make your back to the quiet. It's okay. There will be many trips back and forth while you're there. From worry to listening to planning to speaking to singing to writing to hoping to wondering and then back around again. That's part of life with Jesus. and it's okay.
There have been so many moments in my little life where Jesus has reminded me of this. Me who doesn't need help, thankyouverymuch, and will do it all by myself even if it kills me. He reminds that stubborn pride in me that I need Him. I will be weak. I will be weary. and that's okay.
Maybe all this time, you've been trying to come perfect. You've been trying to come wide-awake when you're just exhausted. Maybe you've been trying to work up some kind of super faith when you're heart is sinking deep in the throes of doubt.
You don't have to hustle for approval in His presence. Come weary. Come beloved.
Come reluctantly or expectantly. Come half-asleep or half-alive or broken into a thousand pieces.
Stare blankly at your dimly lit walls in the chilly, dark morning and say nothing. Or say everything. Rant and rave and whine and cry and bare it all to Jesus- your whole fearful, thankful, jealous, hurt, angry, hopeful heart.
Just come.
Tell Him what's on your heart. Even if the words sound unholy or unacceptable in some way. I promise God can handle it. He can handle impolite. He can handle wild. He can handle your temper. He can handle tears.
Come. Just come.
Come with a stone cold heart and sitting in silence. Come bitter. Come distant.
Read in His presence. or don't. Journal in His presence. Or don't. Sing in His presence. Or don't.
Just come. Honestly. Honestly sit at the feet of Jesus, bringing the entirety of yourself with you.
Maybe you won't feel anything. Maybe you'll feel nothing but the cold seeping through the floorboards and a weary dread for the mundane tasks of another day. Another week. Another year.
Come anyway.
Come even if you're not one bit sure about Jesus in the first place. Start simple. Just come. Look for the open arms, the ones that are welcoming the weary. Start with Jesus, just sit with Him, the one who loves to invite the imperfect: the mad-at-their-kids. the burnt-outs. the sick-and-tireds. the pissed-at-their-spouses. The one who sits in traffic, feeling rage she can't understand. The one who doesn't know what to do, what direction to go. The one who can't balance home and work and family. The one who can't stop crying. The one who's full to the brim with happiness.
Just come. Start with Jesus, who welcomes the overwhelmed. The hopeful. The hopeless.
He's looking at you. You who doesn't have one scrap of their life together, and He LOVES you.
He's looking at you. You who likes to pretend like you have every scrap of your life together, and He LOVES you.
It's just Him. and it's just you.
Just come.
The first step. Really, the only step. Take it.
It's so worth it.
and it's the one you will keep taking every weary, heavy-laden, joyous, hopeful, normal, average, noisy, lovely day of your life.
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